Sindie's Blog

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

A couple of weeks ago, I went to urgent care and saw a doctor about the white patch that was in my mouth, located on the soft palate, right in front of my right tonsil. The doctor prescribed 10 days of ammoxicillin, thinking that it was just a bacteria infection that would clear up. It didn't. I've been off the antibiotics for five days now, and the spot still looks the same. It hasn't changed.

So, I saw a general practicioner today about it. She said it didn't look like it was anything bacterial. She thought it was a discoloration due to a pigmentation change in the skin, like a mole on the epidermal skin. Just to take the right precautions, though, she referred me to a specialist (ENT: ear, nose, throat/mouth doctor), who I'll be seeing in three weeks. In the meantime, I'm left wondering just what the hell is wrong with me.

I feel fine despite the presence of the white patch, but it's a little scratchy from time to time. I was reading up online about possibilities, and the most likely one is something called leukoplakia, which is simply described as white patches anywhere in the mouth, but the thing is, it usually occurs in older men, which I most definitely am not. It also said that one of the causes for leukoplakia can be the EBV (Epstein-Barr virus). The fact that I had mono in 1997 (caused by EBV) and hepatitis last year (also possibly caused by EBV), I'm wondering if that's what this is. Once someone gets EBV, it never leaves the body.

I'm wondering if I somehow caused the irritation by having aggressively rubbed my tongue on the roof of my mouth during alleries three weeks ago, thus upsetting the flora of my mouth and causing the infection. The worst case scenario, of course, is oral cancer, which I hope to God I don't have. It doesn't hurt, and it hasn't changed in size or color. It's not bleeding, nor have I had any trouble eating, chewing, swollening, talking, or breathing. Plus, I'm young and a non-smoker, so chances of it being oral cancer are almost zero... but you never know.

I'm just worried (rightfully so, I'd say). When I talked to people at work about it, I try to keep calm and cool, but inside, a part of me tends to think the worst. I get to thinking, "What if I die from this? Then what would you all say? Would you feel guilty for telling me it's nothing or no big deal or not being more concerned about me?"

I'm sorry - I know I must sound crazy, but something isn't right with me. I sometimes wonder why I had to get mono and hepatitis when I'm generally a healthy person. Geez, I'm young, I take good care of myself - I'm not supposed to be getting strange illnesses!!

posted by Sindie 1:44 PM